Liberation

Personal Log, Stardate 89030.10

Today is the last day of my ninety day Reintegration Program at Starfleet Medical. This is the longest I’ve spent on Earth in one stretch since my Academy days. I’m not sure it’s enough time to make the choice Starfleet requires from me.

Cassandra Sanchez ended the recording and went to the wardrobe on the far side of her room. Her name was the first thing she had reclaimed after being removed from the Collective. She would never forget her time as Two of Five thanks to the Borg neural implants but that was not who Cassandra was.

Her Starfleet uniform was neatly folded on a shelf, still unworn. Instead she exchanged her pajamas for sweat pants and a light sweater. Cassandra caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and paused.

She was still not used to the person staring back at her in the mirror. The medical staff had been able to remove the external Borg hardware but the assimilation process had turned her skin a sickly grey-green that could not be changed back to her old flesh tone.

It was a common condition after liberation and the counselors had spent a lot of time talking to Cassandra about accepting the change.

The counselors had spent a lot of time talking to Cassandra about a lot of things. They talked about how Jean-Luc Picard had been able to resume his duties as a starship captain. He had only been assimilated a short time (nowhere near the three years Cassandra had been a Borg drone) but he still had to carry the knowledge of his time as Locutus and his role in the Battle of Wolf 359. They talked about Seven of Nine who had spent so much time in the Collective that she preferred her Borg designation to her birth name. While not a member of Starfleet, Seven of Nine had still been of valuable aid to the Federation.

Those two were the best case outcomes of liberation. The truth was that many of those that Starfleet had liberated from the Borg could not live with what they had done as drones (and the Borg implants ensured they could never forget). The suicide rate of the newly liberated was alarmingly high.

Cassandra had been assigned to the ninety day program for liberated Starfleet officers. But at the end of the ninety days she had to give a definite answer whether she would return to Starfleet or resign her commission.

The admiral running the program had talked to her about her career. Cassandra was an experienced First Officer. After another year or two she could earn a promotion and her own starship. Once that had been her goal as it was for so many who joined Starfleet. Cassandra was not so sure now what she wanted. She was not the woman she had been three years ago and she was not sure she could find that woman anymore.

Cassandra left her quarters and walked to the recreation building. She approached an available holosuite.

“Load program Sanchez Omega One.”

“Program loaded,” replied the computer. “You may enter when ready, Commander Sanchez.”

Cassandra stepped through the doorway into a scene of utter chaos.

The corridor was dimly lit by back-up lighting and sparks from broken display panels as emergency klaxons shrieked. A door opened to reveal a conference room. Cassandra walked in and went to the windows along one wall.

Outside was a Borg cube maneuvering through the wrecked ships of the task force that Cassandra’s ship, the Hammond, had been part of. And the remains of the Hammond’s saucer section.

Cassandra had been in the engineering section leading the fight against Borg boarding parties when the saucer separated. She did not know why the captain ordered the separation. Cassandra and the last survivors on this deck had been in this room making their last stand when the Borg cube fired on the saucer. They saw its destruction moments before the Borg overran their position.

 “As I recall I suggested you don’t visit here anymore.” Dr. Sabin, Cassandra’s primary counselor, stood in the doorway.

“You’re the one who said I needed to face what happened to me.”

“There’s a difference between facing the past and dwelling in it.”

“How did you know I was here?”

“I instructed the central computer to inform me whenever you visited a holosuite.”

“I would say you have some trust issues, Doc.”

“I would say you’ve proved me right not to trust you.” Sabin’s eyes were unreadable as he crossed to stand next to Cassandra. “Why are you here at this place and time in your past?”

Cassandra choked back a sob. “I expected to die here. We knew there were only two ways our last stand would end. We would either be assimilated or killed. When the Borg broke through we fought back hard so they wouldn’t be able to take us alive. But a blow to the head dazed me and then I was injected with nanoprobes.”

“You did everything you could. It wasn’t your fault you were assimilated.”

“There were 39 of us assimilated from the Hammond’s crew that day. The rest died. I’m the only one who has been liberated. So I’m the only survivor of the Hammond’s last battle.”

“We’ve talked about this before, Cassandra. We can’t help you if you’re not willing to help yourself.”

“I just don’t know if I can be helped.” She saw the look in Sabin’s face. “Don’t worry, Doc. I’m not going to hurt myself. But I have made a decision. I want to see Admiral Geann.”

An hour later Cassandra was let into the admiral’s office. She passed Doctor Sabin who was leaving. Admiral Geann, a slender Andorian, regarded Cassandra from across his desk, antennae twitching slightly. “What is your decision?”

Cassandra maintained eye contact. “I loved being a Starfleet officer but at this time I cannot properly carry out the duties and responsibilities that go with being one. I must, respectfully, resign my commission.”

“Let me make you an offer. Based on your service record and my conversation with Doctor Sabin I’m not ready to give up on you. I can have your Starfleet status changed to inactive. In a year you can still resign if you wish but I hope you’ll choose to return to active duty. In the next year I want you to let Doctor Sabin and his staff help you. You may have given up on yourself but the rest of us have not. You don’t need to go through this alone.”

There was a long pause before Cassandra replied. “That’s a fair deal, sir. I’ll take it.” She added in a soft voice, “Thank you.”

*********************************************************************************

Author's note: This takes place in the Star Trek Online setting in the Prime Universe after the destruction of the Romulan homeworld and the disappearance of Ambassador Spock (which led to the alternate timeline of the new Star Trek movies).